Tips for improving self-esteem during the holidays

Did you know that the months of November and December tend to have the highest rate of suicides? While this is a time for family, we are reminded of those who are no longer with us in life; we may have loved ones overseas in the military, we are experiencing financial burdens, and we are dealing with other life issues.

The following articles are some tips for restoring our self-esteem and finding a light in all of that darkness that some feel trapped within.

Become aware of YOU and change your negative self-talk: Learn not to recognize your self-worth by trying to avoid things like self-blame and feelings of hopelessness. Attempt to replace negative thoughts with more positive, reassuring statements about yourself. Avoid things like self-criticism.

Stop Comparing yourself to others: There will always be someone who is smarter, taller, shorter, thinner, heavier, more attractive, more educated, a higher intelligence, more extroverted, more athletic, etc. But, if you continue to play the 'What If,' and the 'Comparison' game, then you will always feel inadequate and submerged in depression without a lifeline in sight. Stop comparing yourself to others because it only hurts your self-esteem in the long run.

Focus on your strengths: Make a list of your top 10 positive qualities and then circle the top 5 from that list. Review this list often. Are you kind, generous, helpful, honest, creative, empathetic...? Try focusing on the 'What is' and not the 'What isn't.' This task alone should help change your mood, energy, and positive energy levels.

Make decisions that are in alignment with your values: Try to behave in ways that are align with your own values. Stay away from your thoughts about guilt, shame, and discouragement.

Start your day on a positive note: Try asking yourself how you want your day to begin and end. If you take a shower in the morning, imagine the water as a way of refreshing your mind, body, and soul. If you take a shower before bed, then imagine that the water has washed away any negative thoughts you had that day. As the water drains, so does any negative emotions and thoughts. You can now go to sleep feeling like you can dream rather than toss and turn with restlessness.

Make a list of your past accomplishments: These do not need to be monumental successes but something that you are genuinely proud of. If you are struggling here, then think of things that others have been proud of you for. If you are still struggling here, then try to remember a time when someone gave you positive feedback or a pat on the back - whether you appreciated it or not at the time. Some times, it is easier for us to look down at ourselves when we are given praise because we are already feeling sorry for ourselves. However, once we can think more positive about ourselves, then we can begin to feel good about ourselves when others offer us praise.

Cultivate a social life: Isolation can lead to loneliness, apathy, and depression; and all of that can lead to a downward spiral of drugs, alcohol, eating disorders, cutting, suicidal tendencies....basically, a lifeless existence. Join a support group, enroll in classes, join a gym, seek out counseling.

Practice self-esteem exercises: Ask yourself, "What am I happy about in my life;" "What am I proud of;" "What am I grateful for???" There are millions of things in life to be proud for. Try to recognize some more positive attributes about yourself.

The following exercise is designed to help us to think about our life as it is; as it was; and what we inspire it to be. Fill in the blank with the first thought that comes to mind. Note: there are no right or wrong responses.

I like________________________________________________

I want_______________________________________________

My family is__________________________________________

I must_______________________________________________

My place of worship is___________________________________

I love________________________________________________

I feel_________________________________________________

People think of me as____________________________________

I wish people would think of me as__________________________

I need people in my life because____________________________

I often_______________________________________________

God is_______________________________________________

I hate________________________________________________

Someday_____________________________________________

My mother is__________________________________________

My father is___________________________________________

I cannot______________________________________________

I cannot do this without___________________________________

I fear_________________________________________________

I wish_________________________________________________

I failed________________________________________________

I cannot fail_____________________________________________

I would never give up_____________________________________

My greatest success was__________________________________

I need________________________________________________

I believe_______________________________________________

I believe in_____________________________________________

I like__________________________________________________

My worst fault is_________________________________________

My worst fault was_______________________________________

Men__________________________________________________

Women________________________________________________

Life is__________________________________________________

Love is_________________________________________________

I regret_________________________________________________

I was happiest when_______________________________________

At home I_______________________________________________

At home is______________________________________________

I feel like_______________________________________________

I fear__________________________________________________

Marriage is_____________________________________________

A spouse is_____________________________________________

A relationship is__________________________________________

My dreams are___________________________________________

My dream is to___________________________________________

I think of myself as_________________________________________

My life is_________________________________________________

I love my life because________________________________________

I do not like to feel negatively towards myself because________________

I like to feel positive because___________________________________

http://www.examiner.com/article/tips-for-improving-self-esteem-during-the-holidays       

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